Author: Richard Othen
With the wrestling world abuzz about the news of a potential Stone Cold Steve Austin match at Wrestlemania, 19 years after he retired at Wrestlemania 19 in a classic against The Rock. I thought I would take a trip down memory lane and look at some of the most UNDERRARTED moments of Steve Austin’s Career. The moments of “Austin 3:16 says I just whoop your ass,” that Wrestlemania 13 match with Bret Hart and the beer bath given to the Corporation have been played to death, so I wanted to look back at some of the moments you may not remember.
Honourable mention
Before Steve Austin was “Stone Cold “he was Eric Bischoff……sort of. In ECW in 1995 Austin done a backstage promo dressed as Easy E. what happened next was comedy gold. WCW Monday nitro became Monday nightquil. All the old codgers will be using their walkers and trying to keep their dentures in, where the big boys play with each other. No stone is left unturned and no shot is too cheap for Steve Austin here as he vents his frustrations at being overlooked and fired by WCW.
5: Steve Austin vs Bret Hart: Survivor Series 1996
The first encounter between these 2 all-time greats happened at Madison square garden and it was a clinic. Hart is coming back after nearly 8 months away from the ring and Austin is Starting to come into his own as a heel. The build up to the match was awesome, “if you put the letter S in front of Hitman you get my exact opinion of Bret Hart” quipped Austin in an interview segment with his long-time friend Brian Pilman. Austin also attack Pilman in the lead up breaking his former friends ankle in the process, cementing his “Stone Cold” persona. The match at survivor series is a classic and isn’t nearly spoken about enough, Hart uses the top rope to counter the million dollar dream to pin Austin as Austin could not break the hold. Steve Austin became a made man after this night.
4: Linda McMahon makes Steve Austin CEO of the WWE: 1999
When Linda made Austin the CEO of the company it led to some of the best skits in the company. SCSA was feuding with Vince and Shane at the Time and as a way to get one over on her husband Linda gave Austin the “keys to the company” so to speak. Austin shows a receptionist how to answer the phone, “yeah who the hell is this? Really? Well what the hell do you want?” the receptionist cant keep a straight face and is seen giggling to herself. Later he holds a meeting with his staff, after not being impressed by the first guy he promptly fires him for looking stupid, then he promotes the mail clerk to the newly available position and makes all the rest of the employees have a beer drinking contest. He finishes off his day by filling Vince’s office with cow s#%t.
3: sing a long with Austin and The Rock: Nov 12th 2001
This gem came about right at the end of the awful Invasion angle. WCW champ The Rock calls WWE champ Austin to the ring. The two proceed to snatch the microphone our of each others hands during their catchphrases and stealing each others catchphrases too. Its like watching two bratty children arguing in the playground but these guys make it work, it is p#%s yourself funny. Austin gets his feelings hurt (yes you read that correctly) but instead of fighting he wants to sing songs to ease the tension between the two. We get treated to such rendition of “Delta Dawn” by Austin and “The Gambler” by The Rock, before the coupe de grace, a duet of “Margaritaville.” Rocks singing isn’t bad but Austin’s is god awful, words cant describe just how bad his singing is. How Rock kept a straight face I’ll never know. They shake hands, hug, raise each others hands then Rock hits Stone Cold with a Rock Bottom to a thunderous pop.
2: Austin and Booker T brawl in a supermarket: Dec 13th 2001
After Booker T cost Austin the unified title at Vengeance they had a superb brawl in a supermarket during an episode of Smackdown. Booker thinks he catches Austin by surprise and beats him up only to find out it was someone that LOOKED like Austin, Stone Cold then proceeds to walk behind Booker and open a beer, the look on Bookers face is classic. Austin then beats the hell out of Booker with anything he can get his hands on, oranges, ketchup, flowers, mustard, even assorted nuts. Dowsed in flour and cake mix, Booker is loaded into a trolley and wheeled out the back where the beating continued with eggs
and crackers. Book gets a jumping side kick in and turns the tables on Austin briefly “locking” Austin in a milk fridge only for Austin to walk out the front side of the fridge drinking milk and begin beating the hell out of T again. It was glorious in its stupidity.
1: Austin can’t touch Y2J unless physically provoked: 2003
Austin had to retire at Wrestlemania 19 due to his injuries but was made an on screen authority figure during the 2003/04 years and this produced some of the best tv since the end of the attitude era, especially the interactions between Jericho and Austin. The story goes that as Austin was not an active competitor and as an authority figure he couldn’t touch the talent unless physically provoked, naturally Y2J took advantage of this. They would end up in the ring together with microphones, Jericho would insult Austin and get in his face, Steve would remain calm though, even friendly. The next 5 minutes is pure ad-lib, making pop culture references (Jericho’s more dated than Austin’s.) Jericho would steal Austin’s Catchphrase but put his own spin on it. “if you wanna see Y2J have a beer with Stone Cold give me a do wa diddy diddy dum diddy do” Ludacris in its brilliance. They then share some beers together but not before Jericho drops the beer thrown to him which irks Stone Cold, they toast, drink beer and Jericho pats Austin on the back! Physically provoked and its go time. BOOM! A Stone-cold stunner later and its beers all round.
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Photo Credit: WWE